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I approach therapy with a simple question: 

"What do you want out of life, and what is holding you back from that?" 

This question, and your answers, is where we begin the journey. I look forward to hearing from you.

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September 23, 2020

Hang In There

What are you missing in your life that you need to grieve? Consider this invitation to take a moment for yourself.

Life is hard right now.

It's been a hard week, a hard month, a hard year.

Consider this your invitation to take a moment for yourself.  Take stock of how you're doing.  Are you feeling tired, depleted, hopeless, or frustrated?  Are you feeling blessed, supported, or thankful?  You might be feeling a mix of all of these and more.  The tricky part is allowing space for all of them.

Notice what is hard for you in your life right now.

What are you missing in your life that you need to grieve?  Hold that in one hand and let yourself feel those feelings.  You may notice yourself trying to discount them by comparing your hardships to someone else and dismissing yours because they don't seem as great as someone else's suffering.  You may notice yourself trying to discount them by "looking on the bright side" and telling yourself you shouldn't feel upset because you have so much to be thankful for.  Notice those feelings and tendencies.  Sadness and loss don't go away because you ignore them, avoid them, or try to pack them away in a closet.  They need space to be heard and find comfort.  If you want a fun way to see this in action, rewatch the Pixar movie "Inside Out."  If you want to know more about how to grieve, you can read more here.

Then, notice what is good in your life.

Where have you found silver linings in the midst of the hardship?  Where have you found unexpected sources of support and kindness?  Where have you noticed inner reserves and strength you didn't know you had?  What are the little things that you have heightened gratitude for?  These can be a great source of encouragement and hope to keep you going in hard times.  Just remember to keep them in their place, as a source of support, energy, and hope, not as a way to discount harder things you are feeling.  You need both to get through this.

Notice what you are experiencing and what you need.  You are not alone.  You can find the support you need.  Take some time to listen to yourself and take care of yourself today.