When you're feeling down, try these yoga poses to boost your mood.
You do not need a yoga mat or amazing flexibility - just yourself and the willingness to try something new. The standing poses are the easiest to use when you're not at home - use them at your office or wherever you need them.
*Please note these poses will not eradicate depression, but are part of a healthy plan to alleviate depressive symptoms. Read more about creating a comprehensive plan to address depression here. Also note if you have any history of abuse, choose poses that allow you to stay present in your body and do not trigger you.
Legs up the wall
Sit as closely as you can to the wall, lean back on the floor, and allow your legs to rest on the wall. If you have a regular yoga practice and would like to do a supported shoulder stand, headstand, or headstand, these are also helpful.
Forward bends
Seated forward bend. Allow your head and arms to hang heavy over your legs.
Standing forward bend. From standing lean forward and allow your head to hang heavy. You can let your arms hang or hold your elbows as in the demonstration.
Downward dog
From standing forward bend, place your hands on the mat and walk them forward until you are in an inverted V shape. Push with your hands and shift your weight towards your heels as if you are trying to get your chest as close to your legs as possible.
Wide-leg forward bend
Can be done seated (as shown above) or standing. Place your feet a comfortable distance apart and lean forward, allowing your arms and head to hang heavy.
Child's pose
Sit with knees spread apart and toes touching, then lean forward over your legs with your hands and forehead on the mat.
Bridge pose
Resting bridge pose. Place your feet on the mat and knees in the air. Place a blanket or yoga block under your sacrum. Be cautious with bridge pose if you have any lower back problems.
Working bridge pose. Place your feet on the mat with knees in the air. Your feet can be arms length or further away. Gently push into your heels and raise your lower back off the mat. Clasp your hands together underneath you if you desire.
Spinal twist
Lie on your back with your feet on the mat and your knees in the air. Allow your legs to float to the left to where they are comfortable. You can place your left hand on your knees or out beside you, and your right arm on the floor in a T shape.
Now allow your legs to float to the right. Allow your left arm to rest on the ground. You can place your right hand on your leg or the ground.
Fetal position
Lie on your side on the mat, resting your head on your arm, and allowing your knees to bend and rest on the ground.
Resting pose (savasana)
Lay on your back and let your body rest completely. If you have any discomfort in your lower back, place a blanket or pillow under your knees.
Special thanks to Melissa Garner, LMHC, QS, RYT, licensed mental health counselor and yoga instructor, who partnered with me to create this page. She offers yoga classes in the Pensacola area that incorporate mental health. You can find her here. I also interviewed Melissa about the benefits of yoga for mental health and am excited to share that interview soon. Stay tuned!
When you hear the word depression, what comes to mind? Sadness and thoughts of suicide probably top the list. These are signs of depression, but there are others that often go unrecognized...
Surprising signs of depression:
Difficulty concentrating
Quick temper
Irritability (especially true for kids)
Increase in negative/shaming thoughts (that are hard to fight off even when you recognize them and try your best)
Withdrawal
Change in eating habits (eating all the time, not wanting to eat, or even sometimes binging-restrictive eating)
Change in sleeping habits (sleeping all the time, hard to get out of bed in the morning, or conversely not able to sleep as well as normal)
Lack of motivation, energy
Lack of interest in things you used to enjoy
Experiencing these symptoms does not automatically mean you have depression, but it means there is something going on and it would be a good idea to consult a counselor and/or doctor to rule out depression.Other signs of depression can include:
Suicidal ideation, which means thinking about death, dying, or ceasing to exist
Inability to get out of bed in the morning
Hopelessness
Frequent crying, sadness, or tearfulness
If you are experiencing suicidal thoughts, if you have developed a plan, and if you don't know if you can keep yourself safe, seek help immediately. Call 911 or go to your nearest emergency room. You can reach the National Suicide Hotline by calling 1-800-273-8255 or you can chat with them online at https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/chat.
TMS Therapy - a way to alter brain chemistry that contributes to depression without medication
Counseling (if you'd like to schedule a session, you can contact me here)
*Note: Research shows that counseling is more effective for long-term improvement than antidepressants. In my experience as a counselor, adding the treatment of an antidepressant to counseling can make counseling more effective. Clients often report that on an antidepressant, it's like the heavy blanket that was weighing them down has been lifted. They're shocked to find that they are less irritable and less easily angered. With the support of an antidepressant, they are able to effectively work through the underlying issues contributing to the depression. And they're finally able to make use of the rest of the above tools to fight depression. In sum, they feel like they're finally able to make the changes they want in their lives.
An antidepressant is not for everyone with depressive symptoms and is not a cure-all, but it can be a helpful tool to correct chemical imbalances in the brain contributing to depression. (Important note: if you also experience periods of the following: racing thoughts, days with little to no sleep, increase in productivity/creativity, and high-risk behaviors (e.g. frequent sex or overspending), please inform your doctor/counselor so that you get the most accurate diagnosis and effective medication for you.)
When we think of being brave, we usually think of heroes - imaginary superheroes or firefighters rescuing people from burning buildings. What does it mean to be brave in our daily hum-drum lives?Being brave means having the courage to be present. To be who we are. To face reality. To acknowledge we have needs and we need to meet them. To be real.
Being present
Think of a time you've been fully present to an experience, to a conversation, to a moment of connection. Being brave might mean having the courage to step away from your phone or social media in order to fully enjoy a sunset, a game with your child, a date with your partner. It might mean being willing to be present to resolve a conflict, to listen to someone else's opinion even when you disagree, or be aware of feeling discomfort.
Being who we are
It is so easy to modify our view of ourselves based on others' expectations for us. Notice if you find yourself apologizing all the time, or if you compare yourself to others frequently. Sometimes we've learned to be who others want us to be for so long that we don't even truly know who we are. Take the journey to find out. It is so much more fulfilling to be yourself than a shadow version of yourself.
Facing reality
Let's face it, reality is sometimes pretty awful. We may not be able to face the realities in our life and our world alone, but bravery asks us to face them together. As I like to say, "Once you are open to the questions, you can start living the answers. Once you make peace with who you are and where you are, you can begin to move forward again." Some things you can face with friends and family by your side, and some things are so big and overwhelming, you may need the expertise of a counselor to titrate what you need to face. (Just remember, facing does not mean you have to re-live every detail of a difficult memory - it just means you acknowledge it so you can move forward. One of the reasons I love EMDR so much is that you can face it without being overwhelmed and it will decrease the future emotional intensity of the experience.)
Acknowledging we have needs and we need to meet them
Our society idolizes productivity, perfection, and success. No one can keep up with the expectations to be the best at everything. Being brave may mean asking for help instead of pretending like we have it all together. If we don't meet our needs, our bodies have a way of telling us and trying to meet them in unhelpful ways. Maybe we just need a good cry and a hug instead of that pint of ice cream.
To be real
Who are the people you most enjoy being with? Are they people who are comfortable in their own skin, who are real and authentic? When we are around people like that, we can't help but want more. It may not feel safe to be real with certain people. You have to decide when and how to be courageous enough to be real. Start where you'll get positive feedback and keep expanding it. Being real is worth the risk.
What goals do we have for our kids (and for ourselves)? Is bravery one of them? Maybe. To be successful? Definitely.
I would argue that if you want your child to be successful, you also want them to be brave. Unfortunately, we often unintentionally raise our kids to equate perfection with success. When they try to be perfect, they become focused on being the best, and they become fearful of failing. They become so cautious that they only want to try something new if they know they can do it perfectly right away. Moreover, this leads to anxiety and missed opportunities. On the other hand, bravery opens doors to become more confident and take advantage of more opportunities.
Six signs that my child is brave:
They love to be themselves
They aren't afraid to make mistakes
They're excited to try new things (even if they don't know if they'll be good at it)
They see setbacks as challenges instead of failures
They can acknowledge all of their feelings
They stick up for others, even when it's not popular
So, what if I'd like my child to be more brave?
A good place for your child to start is to read Stick Up For Yourself. It teaches kids how to have a sense of personal power and self-confidence.
You can also seek consultation or support from a counselor to make a plan to address your child's anxiety and increase bravery. Theraplay is one of my favorite modalities for helping kids in this area. (Read more about Play Therapy and Theraplay in my blog post "What Actually Happens in Therapy.")
Most importantly, live into this reality yourself. When your child sees you living this way, they will be able to learn it from you first hand.
So, what if I've realized that I've been trying to be perfect and don't know how to model bravery to my child?
Change the way you talk to yourself. Start noticing when you expect perfection from yourself and change your expectations. My blog post A Case of the "Shoulds and Oughts" will get you started.
Gather a support system around you who can help you live into this reality
Get support from a counselor. You don't need to have a major problem to seek counseling. Counseling is also a tool to live into the life you want. EMDR is one modality that is very effective at changing the scripts and patterns of behavior in our lives, and can help you move from perfectionism to bravery.
The person you can't forgive - you keep trying, but every time you see them you're furious again. "Self-sabotaging" in relationships - when your relationship calls for vulnerability or conflict resolution, it stops working. (If you're feeling agitated at any point, hang in there with me, we'll get to the solution soon! If you need to, skip straight to the next paragraph.) When others compliment or encourage you, you just can't quite believe them. You take everything so personally and you don't know why. Feeling overwhelmed no matter how much you plan, prepare, etc. Wanting to feel more confident but you can't talk yourself into feeling that way. Underlying anxiety that you'll do the wrong thing or say something stupid. A disturbing image you just can't get out of your mind. PTSD from a traumatic experience.
Imagine what your life would be like if instead of spending all of your energy trying to avoid, you were able to thrive. If instead of spending all of your time trying to cope, you were able to grow. EMDR can help you get there.
EMDR, or Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing, is a treatment modality that helps you make sense of and overcome difficult life experiences. It generally occurs in a therapy office, although this video references doing a session via video, which is less common. EMDR basically unleashes your body's natural ability to heal. After EMDR, the experience will no longer carry the same emotional intensity. Clients have expressed feeling a sense of freedom, hope, and relief even after one EMDR session.
The Personal Transformation Institute explains EMDR this way, "When something disturbing happens it gets stored in the brain in a way that our human system feels that event is either going to happen again at any moment, or is happening now. When some event happens that may be similar or just has an element that reminds the system of that disturbing event, the brain reacts as if the original disturbing event is happening.
"EMDR helps to move the storage of that memory to a more functional part of the brain that can experience the event as actually being in the past. It is important to know that there is a real physical change happening with EMDR. The events that used to trigger the brain into over-reaction no longer have that effect. The person can now react to the present without the past interfering." (Personal Transformation Institute)
Research shows that EMDR is the gold-star treatment for trauma, and effective for other difficult life experiences that keep you stuck, even though they may not feel traumatic. If you want to read more about EMDR, check out What is EMDR? or Getting Past Your Past by Francine Shapiro, PhD, the creator of EMDR Therapy.
Now think of what you want more of in your life.
Self-confidence, hope, freedom...
This is your chance to get there. Just like spring cleaning takes some work, but gives you space in your life and a fresh start to a new season, EMDR will take some work, but will give you a fresh outlook and a sense of relief. You can let the old baggage go.
You can reach me at (850) 760-0109 or catherine@cqcounseling.com. To find an EMDR therapist in your area, you can search on www.EMDR.com. An important note: Do not try self-EMDR because that can leave you feeling more agitated instead of more at peace. Seek out a professional.
Additional treatment considerations:
What about antidepressants and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)? I've heard they're effective. How do I decide what's right for me? A recent study comparing EMDR, CBT, and antidepressants showed the following results after treatment ended:
Antidepressant: Therapeutic benefit ceased when stopped taking medication
CBT: Maintained benefit after treatment ceased
EMDR: Continued growing even after treatment was over
With CBT, the focus would be on changing your thoughts, which would in turn affect your behavior and your beliefs. And it does work. But EMDR often works even better. Disturbing or traumatic life events are usually stored in a non-verbal part of the brain, and EMDR targets that part of the brain, whereas CBT does not. In addition, withCBT you change the script in your current thoughts and in the current moment.With EMDR, you change the script at the beginning - the place where the belief and pattern of behavior began. You are then able to change the script during all the times in your life you were following that negative or untrue belief.
